Tag: fake rancher

Socialist Dummy Who Is Supposedly A Rancher Chooses To Buy Whataburger Shitmeat For $16 Per Pound.

Clayton was being interviewed by a “guy” who is even shorter and more gay than he is, if you can believe it. During the interview, he was asked what his “go to order” is at Whataburger. This is likely a scripted softball question because I have ridiculed him mercilessly for complaining about “big corporate unhealthy food” while he drives around stuffing his fat face with Whataburger, Taco Bell and Panda Express:

In this interview, Clayton claims he “doesn’t eat bread” and just chooses to eat the 7 ounces of meat with the chemical-laden condiments on it. LOL. His burger costs $7 and he gets 7 ounces of meat loaded with sodium and fats. For the math dummies like Stephanie Fitzharris, that works out to $16 per pound. I think I paid $5.30 per pound of the good stuff at M&M recently.

Here are some of the chemicals listed for Whataburger condiments:

Alum, calcium chloride, natural flavoring, sodium benzoate and potassium sorbate (preservatives), oleoresin turmeric & yellow #5 (colors), polysorbate 80 (emulsifier).

I would think that if you were a REAL rancher, you’d just grab a pound of your own home-grown beef for WAY less than $16 per pound and eat that instead of paying about 250% MORE for fast-food shit that is loaded with tons of sodium and other crap.

Unfortunately, Clayton is not a real rancher. He’s an unemployed bum who lives with his parents and takes pictures of goats on his grandpa’s land every now and then. He also doesn’t care if he pays 250% more for fast-food meat because it’s not his money. It’s campaign money that he grifted off of lonely, deluded old ladies.

Then he goes on to lament that “we” have traded quality for convenience….

(Of course, if shitlibs like Clayton didn’t promote high taxes and force more women into the workforce to stay afloat, they could be home cooking healthy meals for their kids. Clayton has never had a real job OR kids so he thinks everyone just lollygags around all day yapping about socialism with tons of time on their hands – because that’s all he’s done his entire life!)

You can easily go to ANY store and buy lots of “healthy” food for practically nothing. Some people do that, but a hell of a lot more people DON’T do that. It’s quite simple: the morbidly obese slobs who refuse to eat healthy simply like the taste of cheeseburgers more than kale. I don’t blame them. I like cheeseburgers more than kale too.

See, this is America. If you want to eat yourself into an early grave, like Bruce Haywood is doing, then that’s your right. Unfortunately, I end up paying for the fat slobs because they are mostly on Medicaid and Medicare. But CLAYTON wants to tell EVERYONE what to eat – even though he is just as guilty as Bruce Haywood when it comes to eating shit.

Bruce made a choice. A very bad one, but this is America.

Clayton could start a garden and eat all the veggies he wants. But he’s never even done that! He wants to dictate the ENTIRE food system for every person in Texas, but he’s too fucking lazy to grow a SINGLE vegetable himself. That requires effort and sweat and getting your hands dirty. The fake farmer HATES all three of those, so he’ll just go on Facebook and sit on his ass and chide everyone else about their diets.

This means he is a hypocrite and a scumbag and EVERYTHING that comes out of his filthy commie mouth carries zero weight.

Is Fake Rancher Now Sporting A Fake Injury?

What happens when a fake rancher does fake work for years and years? Eventually, he gets a fake injury, apparently!

Less than 24 hours earlier, Comrade Clayton’s soft, delicate hands were uninjured…

Why do I say “delicate and soft as baby shit”? Here’s how they looked on the day he signed his candidacy papers:

Not a scratch, scrape, ant bite, cut or callous to be found. Not even a speck of dirt under a fingernail.

Obviously not the hands of a “farmer.” Those are the hands of a fake rancher or fake grass farmer who spends all his time driving a hybrid wind-up toy truck around Texas and using grifted donations to pay for his semen-frothed mochaccinos at the Starbucks drive-thru!

So the question is: what is the injury, how did he do it, and who wrapped that hand?

It’s VERY shocking that Comrade Clayton hasn’t already made a breathless social media post about how it happened. After all, he’s like a teen girl and posts EVERY time he “gets hurt” on the fake ranch.

I know he didn’t do it trying to have sex with his farm animals, because he has been away from the “ranch” nonstop for the entire week.

The very gayest injury that might explain that ridiculous bandage is a “sprained wrist” which is the most effeminate injury I can think of. So that’s probably what it is. I’m guessing Mercer gets them too. It’s the limp wrist thing…

A deep cut that requires that level of wrapping? I’m guessing he’d freak out at that one and go to the ER – which would have resulted in multiple social media posts. He would have made it a “teaching moment” about how terrible the U.S. health industry is and how we need to be more like Canada – but he didn’t, so that’s out. Besides, how the hell would he cut the palm of his hand? Not like he was cooking a meal or butchering a rabbit.

Perhaps he hurt it in a game of Gay Chicken.

No, I’m guessing the “injury” was some tiny bit of pain that most of us would ignore but for which Comrade Clayton had Izzy the Baby Beluga go run to the store and grab an ACE bandage for him. That’s it. Then he’ll tell the dumb old ladies he hurt himself BAILING hay. LOL.

What a fucking maroon.

Commie Goatwanker Admits His Entire “Ranch” Is Fakery Created For Lib Dummies.

While I was on break, we were treated to this hilarious chain of retardation…

Straight men do not stand like that. Just saying. New Jersey housewives and homos do.

He even calls it a “set”!! Yet another Freudian slip by the vainglorious little turd. What is a “set” in movie parlance?

“It is a temporary, constructed environment that creates the setting for the story.”

Sounds about right.

Back around 1979, a young actor named Mark Hamil stood on a “set” in a Hollywood soundstage filled with fog machines, fake logs, rocks and swamp water. It also contained a small rubbery puppet controlled by Frank Oz which Mark Hamil talked to and called Yoda. It was all total fakery, of course. Complete and utter bullshit made to trick the minds of ten-year-old sci-fi nerds like myself. To us, it was the swamp planet “Dagobah” and was entirely convincing.

It also apparently works on shitlibs who support Clayton Tucker, because they ALSO have the brains of a 10-year-old and are fooled into thinking he’s a “rancher” when he is not. All thanks to the carefully crafted bullshit he posts.

See that big shiny tractor behind the communist knob-head? That’s called a “prop.” It is used for photos and video clips and then put back into the barn until the next “photo shoot.”

Just like his tiny, faggy hybrid truck that can’t actually do any real ranch work. He just drives it all over Texas pretending to be a “rancher.” When he needed to actually move more than 100 pounds of shit, he had to borrow Dad’s REAL flatbed truck, as you can see in the photos below….

The above is Dad’s REAL truck.

Below, is Comrade Clayton’s fake hybrid wind-up truck, which cannot tow or carry shit. It is a “prop” for shitlib morons….

Hilarious!

Five days ago was the first chance Comrade Clayton had to OFFICIALLY file to run for Ag Commissioner. He hasn’t said a word about doing so. I believe the filing period runs until December 5th. I’ll be contacting the Secretary of State and Board of Elections to get my hands on Comrade Clayton’s filing papers.

I’m VERY curious to see how he plans on lying about his credentials in order to qualify for this position. As far as I can see, he does NOT meet the requirements for candidacy.

If necessary, I will sue his ass to keep him off the ballot. Better get ready to spend some of that grifted money on lawyers, you lying scumworm.

Clayton Tucker Turns The “Fake Rancher” Routine Up To 11.

Watch out! Unqualified and ineligible Ag Commissioner candidate Clayton Tucker is angry, ya’ll! He’s using many curse words and said “ain’t” at LEAST three times in his latest video.

Reminder: Clayton is NOT a “working folk”

Ummm, the Big Beautiful Bill is a FEDERAL bill. It’s in Washington DC. It is voted on by U.S. Reps and Senators. You are running for STATE office. So why are you even blathering about this at all? Shouldn’t you be talking aimlessly about Texas shrimp labeling or something?

Listening to him try so hard to be a good-old-boy is the ultimate cringe. It’s like when Hillary and Kamala put on those ridiculous fake accents for whatever crowd they happen to be pandering to.

He tried pulling this “ain’t ain’t ain’t” stuff a few years ago. It was sad then too.

Pasty-white Clayton (who was was born in Georgetown to upper-middle-class parents, whose dad made a great living on government contracts as an aerospace engineer and who was handed a free $80,000 college education in political science before he became a Marxist “community organizer”) wants you to believe he is just a good-old, shit-kickin’, calf-ropin’, steer-wrestlin’, toilet-seat-in-the-back-yard having cowboy, ya’ll!

Truth is, he only invented the rancher persona a couple years ago.

Truth is, RX Ranch has only been in existence for 18 months.

Truth is, his “ranch” (which is listed as existing at 1810 CR 2001) ACTUALLY is his grandpa’s land. Clayton just goes there to take pictures with any goats that happen to still be alive that day.

The Great Coyote Massacre of 2025

Truth is, he has not done ONE THING he said he was going to do on the “ranch website” – not a petting zoo, not goat yoga and not “animal-assisted therapy sessions” lol.

These “services” have been listed as “coming soon!” for a year now.

“Soon” means “never” in Tuckerspeak. Oh, and both mini goats are dead now.

NOR does he sell a single ounce of beef or farm products. He has ONE animal listed as for sale this coming September (if it lives that long).

He also speaks fondly of his “two mini goats” and how he’ll be using them in a petting zoo. Both died long ago. Oops.

Not much of a “ranch” when you get right down to it. More like a failed hobby. I’d even make a wager that he has made MORE money by grifting on his recent “donations” page in the last 3 weeks than he EVER made as a “rancher.”

How about it, Comrade? Want to take that bet?

About That “Water Researcher” Title…

Well, well, well. The Clayton Tucker lies and exaggerations certainly go back a LOOOONG ways, don’t they? All the way back to around June and July of 2012, as it turns out!

I always knew the “water researcher” bullshit on his resume was complete and utter nonsense. He was a junior in college at the time, and the entire “program” lasted approximately 41 days – of which one week was spent “training” in Pittsburgh. Not exactly enough time to have the slightest clue about any subject – especially when everyone over there speaks Chinese.

It certainly sounds like there was no hard science in young Clayton’s college career. Just a bunch of political “science,” which isn’t science at all. You can read the article here:

A Rare Glimpse of China

You don’t want to miss the awesome photo either!

Christ. No wonder the Chinese laugh at us.

Here’s my favorite part, where it basically admits this was all some “political science” bullshit and had absolutely nothing to do with any REAL research. Oh, and it was all in China.

In addition to the Chinese classes he has taken at Southwestern, Tucker said two other classes helped prepare him for the program. One was theTexas Politics Internship Program taught by Political Science Professor Tim O’Neill and the other was the Japanese Politics class taught by Political Science Professor Alisa Gaunder. Tucker said the Texas Politics class covered a lot about environmental policies in Texas…

The program began with a week of training at the University of Pittsburgh, and then participants headed to China June 20.  

Tucker was assigned to apolitical science research team that included a political science professor from the University of Pittsburghand three other students − one from Middlebury, one from the University of Kansas, and one from Cornell. The team spent two weeks in villages along the Yellow River Corridor conducting research on the relationships between local economic development, overdependence on coal mining, the central government, and China’s water supply. Several Chinese students helped the team with conducting interviews, and finding and translating documents.

Wow. Sounds like hard-hitting research! A REAL LIVE political “science” professor was there to guide your research! Impressive. Now I see where his complete lack of anything grounded in facts, mathematics or hard science comes from. He never touched on any of that stuff in college. It was ALL political bullshit from day one.

Oh, also – Alisa Gaunder was educated at Berkeley, in case you are wondering where Comrade Clayton got his communist streak from.

I remember when I was in college, the three big joke majors were (1) political science (2) communications and (3) psychology. This was in 1988, before they had invented the current 27 joke majors like gender studies and all of that crap.

We did get another nice nugget from this article (and another):

Tucker said participating in the program has reinforced his interest in Chinese international relations and Taiwan issues.He hopes it will prove to be a good stepping stone to further studies in graduate school.  

After graduating from Southwestern,Tucker hopes to attend graduate schoolin either Taiwan or China to study Mandarin.

Ah! Graduate school! Now THAT is something I definitely would have expected. The boy who wants to be a professional student forever, becoming more and more book learned in total bullshit subjects and getting letters after his name so he can labor under the delusion he’s super duper smart – and never having to get his hands dirty doing any real work.

[Sounds like someone else we know! “Doctor” Ryan Mata!]

I wonder what happened to that dream? Did good old Dad put his foot down on ANOTHER $80,000 in tuition wasted just to pad Clayton’s resume? Was he not smart enough to get in?

Whatever the reason, it is VERY clear that all this “fifth-generation” rancher bullshit was nowhere on the radar up until about four years ago when he realized he needed to put SOMETHING on the resume when he ran for office!

Here’s another blurb about his dreams a few years later…with no mention of ranching yet again!

Once a liar, always a liar. He’d be a great politician – if he could just get elected!!

Clayton Tucker Now A Fake Lobbyist As Well!

Comrade Clayton sure does wear a lot of fake hats! First it was cowboy, then farmer and now rancher. But he added another fake feather to his cap: fake lobbyist!

This is from his annual postcard bragging about all the stuff he didn’t really do, like “protect folks from bad international trade deals,” as if he was some international envoy and the Biden administration was consulting him and using his vast knowledge of international business – which is possibly the most preposterous bullshit ever to come out of his mouth, considering he’s actually a 34-year-old under-employed loser who lives with his mom in Lampasas.

But even more alarming is his declaration that he “lobbied to pass new laws” to help family farmers and ranchers. Why is this alarming? Because if he ACTUALLY DID lobby anyone at the state or federal level (he doesn’t say which), then he is in big trouble. That’s because lobbyists are REQUIRED to register themselves as a lobbyist!

Unfortunately, there is no record anywhere I could find of Clayton Tucker being registered as a lobbyist!

Ruh roh! According to Google:

The punishment for lobbying politicians without registering as a lobbyist can include significant civil fines, potentially reaching up to $200,000, depending on the jurisdiction and severity of the violation, and in extreme cases, could even involve criminal penalties like imprisonment….

So which is it, Comrade?? Do you admit you lied AGAIN about being something you are not (cowboy, farmer, water researcher, energy expert, ranch founder, lobbyist)? Or do you stick to your guns and get in big trouble for lobbying politicians without registering?

Tough call.

Just kidding, we all know you didn’t lobby shit. Just another of the many, many lies that the communist spews as easily as drawing a breath.

Ground Brisket Hamburgers – Sounds Delish!

Damn! Innovation, marketing, hustle and a real website offering actual products combine to move beef products. Sounds awesome!!

In the other corner we have: fake grifter hobby rancher who puts hats on his goats for pictures. Crap website with non-existent fantasies like goat yoga. Spends his time begging for followers for his Substack, which is a giant mish-mash of shitty writing and retarded ideas….

Cinnabon’s dead twin brother Splenda is still listed on website.

Not the first time begging for followers, either. This is a 34-year-old “male” doing this, btw…..

They are not the same. I absolutely cannot WAIT for Comrade Clayton to run for office again. It’s going to be a barrel of monkeys!!

I AM curious though: what happens at 500 fake, non-paying followers? Pat on the head from mom? A shiny new penny from Dad? The mind boggles.

Socialist Goatwanker Clayton Tucker Admits He Employs Zero People. Yet Demands Other Businesses Pay $17/hr To New Hires.

As we begin a new year and our local socialist approaches his 34th birthday while still living at home with his mother, let’s all have yet another belly-laugh at his incredible hypocrisy:

Nobody actually advertises for $7.25/hr jobs, you fucking moron.

Of course, Clayton’s hero Bernie Sanders has NEVER worked in the private sector himself, let alone employed a single person as a business owner…and he is now 83 years old. Incredible. Eighty-three years of sponging off the taxpayer and NEVER had a real job!!

Clayton is trying hard to follow in Bernie’s footsteps. He too, has never employed anyone at ANY wage, let alone $17/hr….

“I prefer killing my animals myself, with no outside help!”

This is a lie, of course. It has nothing to do with “willingness” to pay a helper. It has to do with there not being enough work out there on grandpa’s pretend ranch to keep another person busy. Also, I doubt mom will pay for another person out there when Clayton has so much free time on his hands that he is able to go to 27 conventions and democrat pow-wows per year!

I can see it now:

“Mom! You need to hire someone else to help me take pictures of goats out there at grandpa’s property!”

“Now Clay Clay…I’ve told you a dozen times you need to spend less time going to conventions filled with men dressed like whores and MORE time actually raising some animals instead of killing so many, dear!”

Speaker at Democrat state convention, which Clayton Tucker attended and wasted an entire weekend on.

Also, Clayton owns a shitload of Apple products (phone, computer, ear buds) and thus supports Apple – a company that only pays their Chinese sweatshop slaves $1.39 per hour.

I’m sure when the RX Ranch Goat Yoga starts, Clayton will hire a Goat Yoga Instructor for $17 per hour plus benefits, right douchebag??