Tag: socialist worm

Clayton “Baby Seal” Tucker Taps Out. Will Not Run For City Council

I have to say, I’m a little disappointed. Our local socialist seal has apparently had enough clubbing for a while.

In the infamous words of Roberto Duran: “no mas!”

This is confusing to me, because just a few months ago, Tucker was talking tough about bringing his shitty, Marxist/commie nonsense to rural areas:

Correction: NOT a rancher

“We ain’t scared of no one!” No one except, of course, the hundreds of voters who would no doubt reject Comrade Clayton’s brand of bullshit for the fifth time in a row (Texas senate, Texas House 54, City council election last year PLUS his attempts to weasel onto City council by appointment AND his attempt to get onto the LEDC board recently).

After being clubbed those five times, it is no wonder his baby seal corpse will be lying motionless during this City council election.

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Clayton will be showing that “we are here and we are present” by hiding in his parents’ upstairs bedroom (where he still lives at age 31) for the duration of this City council election.

What a shame.

In more bad news, incumbent City councilman Chuck “The Vampire” Williamson will be running unopposed.

As you may recall, Chuck was stomped in his last election, but a stroke of Covid luck removed his victor (Gordon Nelson) from council and the woman who pulls his puppet strings just went ahead re-appointed him to council anyways – thus bringing him back from the dead yet again.

With nobody running against him, he will be free to sit next to TJ Monroe as her ventriloquist’s dummy for another two years. Brutal.

Final slate:

Office of Councilmember Place 3

  • Name: Chuck Williamson (incumbent) unopposed
  • Occupation: Retired
  • Date filed for re-election: January 19, 2022

Office of Councilmember Place 4

  • Name: Cathy Kuehne (incumbent)
  • Occupation: Teacher/Business Owner
  • Date filed for re-election: January 19, 2022
  • Name: Myles Haider
  • Occupation: Business Owner
  • Date filed: January 19, 2022

Office of Councilmember Place 5

  • Name: Bob Goodart (incumbent)
  • Occupation: Retired
  • Date filed for re-election: January 19, 2022
  • Name: Davis Keele
  • Occupation: Probation Officer
  • Date filed: February 18, 2022

Hey! He Forgot “Rancher”!

I guess when you have so many false personas, it’s hard to remember them all. I guess Tucker WASN’T a rancher last year when he ran for Senate District 24.

He must have forgotten he was a rancher when he filled out his City council candidate form too, because under “occupation” he put “political organizer” – which means “rabble rouser”….NOT rancher.

What a hero! He’s going to give us all free stuff, save the kids from starvation and end a bunch of epidemics!

Are you going to cure acne and car sickness too?

I think Clayton Tucker has a huge list of fake “hats” and he randomly selects a few to wear each time he runs for office. They include: cowboy, rancher, farmer, teacher, beekeeper, writer, water researcher, environmental researcher, energy policy expert, educator, progressive organizer.

He also has a long list of problems he’s going to solve for you (all while LOWERING your taxes): child hunger, free health care, free education, infant mortality, affordable housing, suicide, maternal mortality (no, I’m not making this up), water scarcity, ‘climate chaos’, big pharma, teacher pay, illegal border jumpers (his solution is just let em in!).

He also like taking pictures in front of an old pickup truck that isn’t his to show that he is “salt of the earth”. That trickery is for the benefit of us rural Lampasas rubes. He didn’t dare show that during his run for TX Senate 24 since a dirty old gasoline truck from the 70’s would get him no points with the greentards and socialists. Back THEN he touted his REAL car: a sedan that gets great mileage.

Fake rancher needs old pickup prop and dog to look legit for rural campaigns

REAL car – used only during urban political campaigns to tout enviro creds

Don’t forget, before he was a fake rancher, he was a fake cowboy!

Pretty sure that might be a ‘cowboy hat’ from a Buc-ees gas station (?)

Call me crazy, but I doubt a REAL cowboy or rancher needs to put “he/him/his” on his profile. That’s because REAL cowboys are men and they understand the basic science of only two genders. Apparently ‘progressive’ fake cowboys do not understand this.