This Year’s Christmas Presents To My Favorite People

If you have been reading here for the last 4.5 years (wow!), you know I like to send presents to all my favorite shitbirds every Christmas.

In 2019, I sent City council seven lovely goldfish ornaments – representing the seven goldfish who sit on council. I even showed up at the City Hall Dedication Ceremony and placed them on the tree myself:

In 2020, I sent a full-face Narwal mask to Covid Cult loon Julie Landrum – owner of Wool & Vine Cry & Whine:

These are now a collector’s item…since MOST of the country eventually came to their senses and realized Wuhan Flu was a giant scam. Narwall quickly went out of business, so this mask is probably worth thousands of dollars now. People will look back and say “holy shit, people lost their minds like it was the Salem Witch Trials”. This is a relic from that era.

Last year, everyone got ornaments:

Unfortunately, Potato Head Stephanie Fitzharris was a total ingrate and decided to report me to the police! Can you believe it? Miss “Defund the Police” herself wasting the cops’ time because I was nice enough to send her a Christmas ornament?

Shit like this is supposed to scare me. It doesn’t.

Don’t worry, Potato Head…I got you something REALLY nice this year. Hint: it will be coming in the mail and will COST you a bunch of money! And you will NOT like it.

So this year I decided to get something for local socialist bum Clayton Tucker…

Human-sized and man-shaped teddy bears are now a thing, which have been designed for lonely women. Known as Loving Bear Puffy, the $135 giant teddy replicates the male body, with the head of an adorable half-asleep bear.

Miss Tucker will LOVE it! Yeah, it costs a bit of money, but it is totally worth it. I may sew a picture of Robert Francis O’Rourke’s face on it before I mail it out.

Enjoy!

Evidence Piling Up That Local Socialist Clayton Tucker Is Actually a Woman. Twelve Pieces of Proof:

Apparently Clayton Tucker wants to mock the right…

Re-education camps? Where does the loony left get this insane shit? If ANYONE should be worried about fascist assholes sticking people in camps, it’s OUR side. It wasn’t very long ago that libtarded Covid Cult lunatics were suggesting all the unvaccinated people be forced into quarantine and prohibited from flying or crossing state lines or leaving their houses.

Remember that? And their biggest cheerleader was a chink from communist China – the very country that unleased that virus on us.

You want mocking? I’ll give you mocking. It is now Mock Socialist Clayton Tucker week.

How is this for mocking: I think you are actually a woman.

Clayton Tucker USED to put her “preferred pronouns” on her Twitter page, but that has disappeared recently. Is this a subtle hint? Or did she FINALLY get it through her thick, unemployed skull how absolutely ridiculous and off-putting that woke shit is around these parts?

Old page demanded you say “he/him/his”

Then it went away….

From pronouns to NO nouns. Weird!

ALSO notice that she quietly removed the part about being a cowboy. I guess merciless ridicule and exposure of truth will do that. Of course, she STILL insists that she is a rancher…which is another lie we have exposed and will continue to mock repeatedly.

But let’s look at the other evidence….

Drives a Chevy Equinox – a girl’s car. You may as well be driving a Mini Cooper or Mazda Miata.

Uses Apple Pay – only chicks do that.

Depends on a man (his dad) for a place to live.

208 S Western is Dad’s house. Real men don’t depend on other men to provide them a roof over their heads. Real men also aren’t “political organizers” – pussies are.

Dresses like a lesbian at hemp fest – complete with purse.

Writes a check to pay for an oil change – like an old lady at HEB.

Uses an app to keep track of fasting and posts it all over social media like a 14-year-old chick with an eating disorder…

190 pounds is quite heavy for a midget!

Dresses his pet dwarf animals up in hats like a 10-year-old girl dressing her Barbie dolls…..

Publicly takes those stupid on-line Facebook and Twitter “tests” that are about as real as your horoscope (which is also a chick thing)…

Poses in front of vehicles that aren’t his to take selfies – pretending they are his. Kind of like chicks do.

Declares his birthday on social media…just like girls do.

And the most recent (and most damning) fact: Uses the adductor/abductor machine at the gym. I shit you not. I couldn’t remember what that thing was called after I saw him using the “girl machine” – so I had to look it up. It’s THIS thing…

All I know is that in 25 years of going to dozens of different gyms, I have NEVER seen a male use it….until recently when Clayton hopped on and used it while browsing on his iPhone. If you can browse on your phone while “working out”, you are not working out. That’s ALSO a chick thing.

EVERYONE knows that machine is (1) targeted at women and (2) is a piece of shit that doesn’t work. So not only are you a woman, but a very dumb one at that!

What’s up with that Clayton? You trying to spot-reduce some saddlebags or something? Jesus Christ. What’s the matter – didn’t want to use your mom’s Thigh Master at home?

There is no generation more sad and useless than the millennial generation. A bunch of lazy, wussy soy boys.

More mocking of Clayton Tucker will be coming soon…..

Socialism Nearly Killed The Pilgrims

Luckily, it only took the pilgrims a year to figure out that socialism doesn’t work. As opposed to today – where morons well into their adult life STILL think it’s a grand idea.

What the pilgrims knew about socialism and private property by John Stossel:

The Pilgrims had clashing ideas about how to organize their settlement in the New World. The resolution of that debate made the first Thanksgiving possible.

The Pilgrims were religious, united by faith and a powerful desire to start anew, away from religious persecution in the Old World. Each member of the community professed a desire to labor together, on behalf of the whole settlement. In other words: socialism. But when they tried that, the Pilgrims almost starved.

Their collective farming — the whole community deciding when and how much to plant, when to harvest, who would do the work — was an inefficient disaster. “By the spring,” Pilgrim leader William Bradford wrote in his diary, “our food stores were used up and people grew weak and thin. Some swelled with hunger… So they began to think how … they might not still thus languish in misery.”

His answer: divide the commune into parcels and assign each Pilgrim family its own property. As Bradford put it, they “set corn every man for his own particular. … Assigned every family a parcel of land.”

The Pilgrims’ simple change to private ownership, wrote Bradford, “made all hands very industrious, so as much more corn was planted than otherwise would have been.” Soon they had so much plenty that they could share food with the natives.

Happy Thanksgiving! Before we eat that turkey today, we should first thank private property rights because they protect us from the “tragedy of the commons” that resulted in starvation and death for the early Pilgrims’ failed experiment with Bernie Sanders-style socialism! Without property rights, Thanksgiving Day would instead be “Starvation Day.”

Socialism is being repackaged and recycled by today’s left-leaning politicians including Sanders and Ocasio-Cortez and is being taken seriously by a new young and gullible generation, many who weren’t even alive when the historic events of the 1980s and 1990s occurred including the fall of the Berlin Wall and the collapse of the Soviet Union. But the lessons from history about the defects, deficiencies, and failures of socialism are very clear. As we’ve learned from countless examples throughout history, including now Venezuela, the main difference between capitalism and socialism is this: capitalism works.

Dummies Blame “Alt-Right” and Straight White Men For Recent Shootings. Immediately Proven HUGELY Wrong Within 48 Hours

You gotta hand it to Comrade Clayton Tucker. It’s VERY hard to be wrong every single time you open your mouth or tweet. VERY hard. I mean, go ahead and try to pick four losers in the NFL this weekend. It’s tough. Even if you TRY to be wrong, you are invariably, accidentally right SOME of the time.

Not Comrade Clayton, however. The bodies hadn’t even cooled at the gay nightclub shooting scene before local self-hating white “male” (and possible homosexual) Comrade Clayton Tucker was blaming those evil white guys in a re-tweet. The rest of the liberal morons were doing the same – blaming Tucker Carlson and the “white supremacist GOP”.

Even our local pudgy, hysterical doughboy (and DEFINITE homosexual) Cade Snyder/Hilgenberg jumped on the bandwagon. Blaming straight white males for everything and posting a screed that was written by an unhinged mind…

Oh my. Calm down, Sally. Your personhood is routinely challenged? LOL. What does that even mean? What a drama queen (pun intended). You will not fuck anybody up. You look like this, for Christ’s sake…

Yes. Frightening indeed.

Comrade Clayton re-tweeted this pure dreck…

Yeah, Latinos never shoot anything up.

And gays never kill other gays…or chop them up into little pieces and eat them.

Well, that entire tweet is complete and utter horseshit. In fact, we found out yesterday that the guy who shot up the nightclub isn’t some “right winger”. He is another weirdo fuck who claims to be “non binary” (I still don’t know what that is, but it ain’t a straight conservative guy, that’s for sure) who used the moronic pronouns of “they/them” and insisted on being referred to as Mx. Aldrich. LOL. OOPS!

So I guess gay people ARE shooting up nightclubs after all! Oh, and a black guy shot up a Walmart just last night. You wouldn’t know that, however, because the media is silent when a black guy goes on a shooting spree. It’s always “details are sketchy” when that happens. But turns out he was black – which I predicted this morning when they didn’t name and shame him 5 minutes after the shooting…

From the look of one of his photos, I wouldn’t be surprised if he was gay too. Not that they’ll ever admit that.

Also, did you forget about the Muslim piece of shit who shot up Fort Hood back in 2009 and killed 13 white people (including a pregnant woman) and injured 30 others? He shouted Allahu Akbar right before he opened fire. Doesn’t sound like a white right-winger to me!

Or how about that racist piece of shit Darrell Brooks who mowed down a bunch of old white people in Wisconsin last Christmas? Yeah – the media was silent about that one too….and he was an ACTUAL racist!

Accused killer Waukesha parade driver posted toxic anti-white rhetoric.

But that doesn’t count because it’s OK to hate white people, as far as the mainstream media is concerned.

Want more examples? OK!

Just recently, a black student shot and killed three University of Virginia football players. You REALLY had to look hard to find a picture of the guy when he was on the loose, because he was a black dude – and we can’t have that.

Suspect accused of killing 3 University of Virginia football players is denied bond as new revelations emerge

There are countless stories of black teen mobs terrorizing Whitey – but those are ignored too. Like when it was “Beat Whitey Night”” at the Iowa State Fair:

“Beat Whitey Night” At Iowa State Fair

Here is another….

Did you know the FBI STOPPED KEEPING TRACK of race when it comes to rape? Turns out that like 99% of interracial rapes were black men on white women. We can’t have that either.

In the United States in 2005, 37,460 white females were sexually assaulted or raped by a black man, while between zero and ten black females were sexually assaulted or raped by a white man.

Why is the data so old? Because they refuse to break it down racially anymore. It didn’t feed the narrative of Whitey oppressing blacks.

But tell me again how it’s ALL because of those “crazy right wingers” and “alt-right” white male assholes.

So, to put it short and simply (in deference to morons like Cade and Clayton), the reason you THINK that Right-Wing Whitey is doing all this violent damage to minorities is because you listen to propaganda on CNN and other mainstream media sources who do everything in their power to disappear all the black-on-white atrocities and make sure to amplify any white-on-black or straight-on-gay atrocities. You are brainwashed morons.

Put even more simply: go fuck yourselves.

Power Blackouts Loom For Quarter of All Americans

And no, Comrade Clayton, it’s not Greg Abbott’s fault. It’s the fault of WAY too much “green energy”. The very green energy that ignorant fools like yourself insist we install more of.

When you prioritize electricity from intermittent wind and solar via massive market-distorting subsidies, it destroys the efficiency of the grid by forcing the rest of the supply stack (dispatchable) to dance around wind and solar’s intermittency.

[I doubt Comrade Clayton even knows what the word “intermittency” means]

If batteries are the solution to wind and solar intermittency who do you think balances the intermittency without batteries? Dispatchable generators.

So the subsidies for wind & solar have two distorting effects, not only do they encourage way more wind and solar penetration than is ideal but they also ruin the economics of the entire rest of the grid, the dispatchable backbone.

This means investment for dispatchable generators gets starved at the same time that investment floods into intermittent sourcesbut, you can’t get rid of the dispatchable sources because they have to be able to replace 100% of the intermittent production at any given time.

It will show up in subtle ways at first, like the Winter storm Uri disaster in Texas, but over time it will take less and less “extreme” weather to break grids. The system is designed to fail.

Wind and solar are the woke power providers insisting that they be accommodated at the expense of the reliable power sources. They hurt the efficiency of the grid, increase costs and reduce reliability.

If Greentards were REALLY interested in what’s best for the planet AND for humans, they would be pushing nuclear hard. Texas could easily build 3 or 4 nuke plants to handle baseload needs. But Greentards block nuke plans at every turn.

If we see rolling blackouts this winter, be sure to carry your torches and pitchforks to where they belong: the houses of radical liberal greentards like Clayton Tucker and Bruce Haywood.

Local Incel Irrationally Worried About Abortions

Local socialist loser and incel Clayton Tucker just cannot stop worrying about abortions!

This is like me whining that I can’t legally play blackjack at a casino in Texas. If playing blackjack all the time was that important to me, I’d move to Las Vegas – where it IS legal. See how that works? Each state decides what it wants to legalize. It’s a beautiful experiment and the Tenth Amendment makes it all possible.

Let me put your mind at ease, Comrade Tucker. The odds of you needing to worry about an abortion are astronomical.

Here is the calculation – we need to figure out the odds of a few things happening – all dependent on each other.

Odds of:

Meeting a chick who will talk to you for more than 15 minutes and shares your love of socialism and doesn’t mind that you live with your mom: 15%

Convincing this chick to have sex with you before creeping her out permanently or boring her to death with talk of windmills and solar panels: 20%

Maintaining erection while looking at someone who is NOT Robert Francis O’Rourke: 10%

Banging her on a day she is actually fertile: 20%

Since all of these conditions must be met for a baby to be made, the odds of you ever impregnating a chick are (.15 x .2 x .1 x .2 = .0006 or 0.06%) – which converts to approximately 1665 to 1 odds.

I wouldn’t give it a second thought, buddy. You’re safe.

Tired of Getting Screwed With 0% Interest By Local Banks? There Is a Solution.

So the Fed has raised rates yet again – and now Fed Funds sit at 3.75% – 4.00%.

You know what local banks are offering me on my account, even after the Fed has jacked rates from 0% up to 4%?

Zero (actually about 1/2 of one percent – 50 basis points)

That would be the same 0% that they offered me for the last 10 years when Fed Funds were also at 0%. Now the Fed raises rates 400 basis points and my bank raises MY rate only 50 basis points?

That is bullshit.

There is a way to get a risk-free 4.5% now, if you’re willing to tie your money up for 1, 3, 6, or 12 months at a time. It is essentially a CD (certificate of deposit) and can be laddered the same way.

[Learn about laddering here]

All you need to do is set up an account to buy T-bills DIRECTLY from the U.S. Government. Go to www.treasurydirect.com and set up an account. It’s free – and you can quickly link your local bank account to your Treasury Direct account.

The yield curve is massively inverted right now – a sign of recession. Six-month and one-year bills are very fat….

THEN, you start buying in chunks. Maybe today you buy some 1-month, 3-month and 6-month T-bills. Then next month you do the same. Then you do the same the month after that. Eventually, when you have laddered these differing durations properly, you will have a T-bill coming due every month and you can decide to re-invest or just take the cash if you need it – which means parts of your money are never really tied up for more than 30 days.

Shit, if you’re wealthy enough, maybe you toss $100k into the one-year bill and you are $4,600 richer next November than if you had left your money sitting in your local bank account getting screwed.

I had one of these accounts about 20 years ago – back when you actually got interest on your money. I had forgotten about it until recently.

I meant to write about this last month when there was a tremendous opportunity to lock in over 9% on an I-Series bond:

Rush on I bonds paying 9.62% is crashing TreasuryDirect website

Oh well. I got in and you didn’t. Those are the breaks. But you can STILL get up to TEN TIMES better interest rates than you get at your local bank.

Even now, I-bonds are yielding 6.89% if you can tie up your money for a year – a FAR CRY from my local bank’s paltry 0.75% offering.

Here is a sample of LOCAL interest rates:

Passbook account: 0.20%

Six month CD: 0.50%

One year CD: 0.75%

That is a screw job.

Here are the recent rates I got on T-bills through my Treasury Direct account:

One-month T-bill: 3.64%

Three-month T-bill: 4.25%

Six-month T-bill: 4.60%

One-year T-bill: 4.73%

Again, it is FREE to set up an account and it takes maybe 5 minutes. You can quickly and easily transfer funds between your local bank and the U.S. Treasury. These are RISK FREE debt instruments auctioned DIRECTLY from the U.S. Treasury.

You’re welcome.

Lampasas Sales Tax Receipts Slow Drastically In October.

Well, I finally found the sales tax receipt number for October…and it ain’t real pretty.

[Payments to cities – see row 585]

Receipts grew only 3.44% compared to October 2021 – $251,000 versus $243,000 a year earlier.

Considering inflation is currently raging at anywhere between 8% and 12% (depending on who you believe) and that the state of Texas as a whole saw sales tax revenue increase almost 12% year-over-year, it is clear our City is now lagging badly.

If the price of everything went UP 10% in the last year, but your sales tax receipts (which are not adjusted for inflation) only went up 3.4% – then you are actually seeing a decline in sales.

All those millions borrowed by the City and the LEDC for their business park and other dubious projects? Don’t sweat that. According to Mayor Monroe:

“Typically, we are able to pay those down within the nine years and have saved a substantial amount of money”

I’m sure it’ll all work out. And if it doesn’t? Well, there are plenty of taxpayer cows to be milked harder if need be.

Damn, the 70s Were Awesome

“Dad, there’s no seat belt back here.”

“Then wrap the vacuum hose around your waist, you pussy.”

Clayton-Tucker-types would have NEVER made it through the 70s.

“You think tail gunners in WWII worried about seatbelts? Shut up, hand me those Pall Malls and let’s go”.

Actually, more like “”Here take the seatbelt from up front because we cut them out.”

No one in the 70s was asking about seat belts. It was all “I call way back!”. The “way back” was the place to be on long car rides. Only the suckers sat in the back seat. Lived back there because you could get away with murder and dad’s arm couldn’t reach us! It was worth the risk.

My dad had a Geo Metro with the back seat taken out and he let my little sister ride up front because ‘she had more life to live’. She was only two years younger than me. LOL.

GEN X, the last tough generation.

LEDC Needs To Keep All Their Lies Straight.

A few days ago, the Lampasas Dispatch had a front-page story titled “Hearing set for LEDC Business Park plat“.

Towards the end, we got some info from City manager Finley deGraffenreid:

In mid-October, City Manager Finley deGraffenried described the project as “nearing substantial completion.” He told council members the park’s roadways had been paved, and the park will be ready to market to potential commercial tenants soon.

Part of their “marketing” will be blowing about $15,000 on videos and ads for the Business Pork. Of course, they did the exact same thing back in 2015 and 2018 the FIRST time the Business Pork was “finished” and ready to move into….with zero results, obviously. The Pork sits empty despite over $7 million committed to the project to date.

But I have to ask one silly question: why do we need to spend one single penny on marketing? After all, we were told by Mandy Walsh back on July 27, 2021:

“We receive RFIs [request for information] from the governor’s office on a weekly basis – and they’re all looking for acreage and, currently, as it stands, there is nowhere to put someone…that’s looking for even 2 to 5 acres…we’re having to pass up on some possible prospects because we don’t have the land and we’re not fully developed”

In fact, every economic director and LEDC president since Michael Talbot back in May of 2004 has told this exact same lie: we get NUMEROUS requests from the governor’s office from interested businesses, but we just don’t have [fill in the blank here – money, utilities, roads, brains, etc]

May 2004
June 2004
July 2004
June 2014

So if they have been (and still are) getting NUMEROUS weekly inquiries since 2004 (52 weeks times 18 years = 936 inquiries, at LEAST) then why do they need to spend $15,000 to market this thing? According to their previous lies, there are people beating the door down to move into this thing.

Of course, those lies were usually told when they had their hand out for money. Like The Great Valentine’s Day Begging scene from earlier this year – when Talbert managed to pilfer $971,000 in “Covid relief” funds from the City.

Not to MENTION, the “about four” serious prospects that Mandy told us they had earlier this year. Lemme guess: none of THOSE worked out either??