Meet the most stereotypical, basic liberal Austin bitch you’ll ever have the displeasure of seeing – Carol Garner Doughty:
This elitist, Austin virtue-signaling Karen is married to a tech nerd who looks like the love child of Steven King, Steven Hawking and Frankenstein. She apparently still makes the poor bastard wear a mask…
That woman’s face is the face of pure liberal misery and hatred. The thought of all the Texans around her owning guns, driving pick-ups and voting for Ted Cruz has literally eaten her up from within like cancer. Just like liberal Connecticut congresswitch Rosa DeLauro…..
You just know Carol met her poor sap of a husband (who is likely on the spectrum and some kind of computer genius), gave him the first and likely last blowjob of his life, and he is now henpecked daily while she spends his fortune in Apple stock on Teslas, Priuses, trips to Greece and yearly home remodels…
She despises Texas even as she has reaped the benefits of her husband being paid handsome sums from Apple free of state income tax. Picture Stephanie Fitzharris minus 200 pounds but 100x more virtuous than even the most rabid virtue-signaling libs…
She checks all the boxes: drives a Prius AND a Tesla, still believes Trump is a Russian agent, despises guns, only shops at Whole Foods and Trader Joe’s, is 100% pro-mask and pro-vax, thinks Zelensky is a hero, wants Tucker Carlson arrested, has a kid who is “LGBTQ+,” wants ALL fossil fuels ended NOW, is a champion of Ukraine, Black Lives Matter and any other asinine cause under the sun.
And why not? She has nothing else to do all day but go to trendy, overpriced “exercise” classes and bitch on Facebook about how much she hates the “backwards, violent, bloody state of Texas” full of “greedy mass murderers”……
Thankfully, she is finally LEAVING Texas!
I’ll give you all a moment to cry over this.
I can’t tell if her LGBQTLMNOP “kid” (who is 29 years old and shouldn’t need “protecting” by mommy) is a very-effeminate male or a masculine female. Frankly, I don’t give a shit and neither does anyone else – which must drive an attention whore like Carol crazy. None of us care how gay your kid is. We are just against castrating and mutilating the genitals of minors. Big difference.
Wait – how can you be leaving Texas because of your LGPQZT+ kid when he/she/it lives in OHIO?!? It says right there – “down for a visit” and “the Ohioans are HERE!” You really should do your homework before making up your ridiculous virtue-signaling lies. Next thing you know, you’ll be making up shit about waltzing into a hospital and handing an old man food because you’re such a saint….
[Lots of hospitals let complete strangers waltz in to the recovery rooms of other complete strangers and hand them food. Totally normal!]
But the best part is SHE’S LEAVING TEXAS!!! What a concept. I wonder why other whiny libtwats (**cough**Fitzharris*cough** Haywood ** Tucker**cough*) don’t do the same. Instead of whining non-stop over everything and trying to fuck things up for the rest of us, just go move to Oregon or California or some other liberal dump and everyone will be happy.
Carol and her wallet are moving to libtwat paradise: Massachusetts.
They will be moving to Lenox Massachusetts, to be exact. Which is odd, because Lenox Massachusetts is 98.57% WHITE.…but THAT can’t be right, because Carol Garner Doughty has spent countless hours on Facebook humblebragging about how much she cares about the poor, downtrodden and oppressed blacks…
…but, like most hypocrite limo liberals, she doesn’t actually want to LIVE around any of the poors OR blacks! Gross! So she will be moving to Lenox, MA where only 0.30% of the town is black – just enough to clean her house and mow her lawn.
Oh, and the median income for a family there is $111,413. So much for leading by example, eh Carol?
Her timeline is also peppered with LOTS of humblebragging about all the trips they take….
They must travel to Greece and New York by bicycle, because she ABSOLUTELY wants fossil fuel use ended NOW!
I wonder how she will be heating her new mansion in Lenox Massachusetts? It’s colder than a polar bear’s ass there for a good chunk of the year. Forget about propane, natural gas or heating oil – those are evil fossil fuels! I guess she’s just going to make her poor obsequious husband rub sticks together for warmth.
Speaking of sticks, Carol was absolutely DISTRAUGHT when some trees got knocked down in a storm…
In one of the funniest exchanges I’ve ever seen, Potato Head Fitzharris (who so BADLY wanted to be in the upper-echelons of the liberal virtue-signaling Lakeway/Austin area and clearly craves the approval of Queen-Bee-Carol) offered up the services of her kid and husband to help out. Carol’s answer is priceless:
Thanks, friend! Um, what’s the name of your entire family again? BAHAHAHAHAHA! Poor Potato Head. That must have been like driving a dagger through her fat monkey heart. No wonder she pulled up stakes and moved here. She cannot HOPE to compete with bitches like that. I almost felt sorry for her when I read that. ALMOST.
I’d like to think that Carol Garner Doughty will be gone from Texas forever, but we all know how it is with these idiot liberals. Remember all the celebrities that were going to move to Canada when Trump won? Or the morons who were going to move after Roe v Wade was overturned? Yeah – they all lied about that.
Just imagine when Carol gets to Massachusetts and EVERYONE in the neighborhood is an even bigger liberal bitch than her? Who can she be better than? Who can she look down upon? Nobody. Potato Head is back here in Texas. It’s more likely that Carol will be the new Potato Head of HER neighborhood and she’ll be groveling for approval.
I suspect she will come crawling back to Texas after she realizes (1) it’s cold as shit up there (2) everything is super expensive and taxes are high (3) she gets her first heating and electric bill (4) all her neighbors have tranny kids, which trumps her merely-gay kid and (5) she gets out-virtue-signaled by every other chick in the area.
We will have much more on this insane, evil commie loon in the near future….