Wow. The previous four generations of Tucker goat ranchers must have jealously guarded all their accumulated knowledge from poor Clayton. He has to go to the beginner class when he’s nearly 33 years old!
I am trying to imagine what those notes look like. Hmmm…..
#1 – It’s Blue KOTE, not Blue NOTE. Stupid, stupid Clayton! Never make that mistake again!
#2 – I work on a RANCH. Ranch, ranch, ranch. NOT a farm. Ranch for animals…FARM for crops. How the hell am I going to remember that?? Better write that on my hand or something.
#3 – I wonder what Bernie Sanders is doing right now. I think I’ll tweet at him. God it’s freezing in here. They are totally ruining the planet by running the AC so much. I should inform the guy in charge that he needs to be more mindful of Mother Earth because we are all going to die in 12 years if he doesn’t turn down the air. He’ll appreciate my concern, I bet. I’ll give him some Bernie Sanders literature as well. People love that!
#4 – “Goats are browsers…sheep are grazers.” Cool! I’ll have to Google the word “browser” later, but that is SO cool!
#5 – “Sell goat for MORE than you paid for it.” Do this over and over. Hopefully MORE than the original cost of goat, plus all the inputs like food, mineral licks PLUS my time! Golly, this capitalism is hard. I always forget to value my time. That’s probably like $100 an hour right there.
#6 – “Common cost associated with raising goats: feed, alfalfa, mineral licks, vet bills, property taxes.” Wait, property taxes? WTF is that? The thing grandpa pays every year to the friendly government person? I should offer to pay that, maybe. Cant be more than $20 or $30 bucks, I bet.
#7 – Call Beto. See if I can get that mean Irish inch in my ass again soon. Oops…did I just write that down? Fuck. I wish pens had erasers.
He could have saved himself a lot of time and money and just bought Storey’s Guide to Raising Meat Goats.