Gee, working out in the REAL world to create something out of nothing is hard work, isn’t it? It’s not like a little virtual computer farm on your Facebook page. Shit doesn’t go your way a lot of the time. The donkeys you bought to protect your goats don’t do their job. Kids disappear. Maybe it was coyotes. Maybe vultures. But the fifth-generation rancher doesn’t really know. The four generations of Tuckers that came before him apparently didn’t teach him about looking at tracks or scat or how the animals were eaten/bitten to determine these things.
I guess they didn’t cover kid birth in the beginner ranching course he took a few weeks ago, either. I’m no expert fifth-generation rancher. I’m just a dummy Lampasshole. But even I figured out quickly when the doe is close to birth. She kind of hangs out by herself and paws out a “nest” on the ground. It’s quite obvious. Then you keep her and the kid penned up so coyotes can’t get them.
Wait, so the “fifth-generation rancher” who just took 10 pages of notes at a beginner ranching class didn’t know to keep the newborn kids penned up for a good long while so they don’t get eaten? The same asshole who posts pictures of himself shoveling shit out of pens didn’t think to actually USE those pens to protect newborn kids?
BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.
Of course, your choices are either (1) keep mom and kids penned up 24/7 and pay to feed them alfalfa, goat feed or other stuff that costs good money OR (2) let them in and out of the pen every single day to browse in the field. Choice #2 means you’ll have to actually drive over to grandpa’s house twice a day to let them out and corral them back in later in the evening. It’s called a “goatherd” – like a “shepherd” but with goats, see? You kind of keep an eye on them and protect them. That will severely cut into your Twitter and Facebook time – and the millennial douchebag fake rancher can’t have that.
But instead of a guard dog or electric fence or an alpaca or something, Comrade Clayton is “looking into cameras” for the field. Cool. You’ll only need about 50 of them to make sure you cover every square inch of the “open field.” I’m sure mom will buy you those for Christmas if you ask really nice. Make sure she buys lots of batteries, too. You moron.
But there’s more! In his usual fashion, Comrade Clayton is pontificating on things he knows absolutely nothing about – then spouts the wrong answer with full confidence. Kind of like he does with wind power, or using a wrench incorrectly…
Things which could be learned from the four generations of ranchers that supposedly came before him. Or even from the Internet with a basic search.
Things like the difference between a vulture (we have two kinds in Texas and yes, the black vulture will go after living animals at times – I’ve seen it myself) and a buzzard (there are no buzzards in Texas, and yes buzzards definitely eat live animals like rodents)
The fifth-generation rancher who spends all day on the Internet was unable to figure this out. Yet informs everyone of the wrong answer with such confidence. Hey, wait! This is MISINFORMATION!!! Arrest that fucker!
I’m going out on a limb here, but if your “ranch” is only selling a couple of goats every year while the rest get eaten by predators, then you aren’t going to make it, buddy. Of course, we knew that from the start, because you aren’t a real ranch. You’re just a trust-fund nerd who goes over to grandpa’s property and feeds some goats every now and then and posts pictures on social media for all the old, lonely, moronic democrat ladies.
Try running a REAL small business sometime, instead of just dicking around on grandpa’s ranch where someone else supplied the land and equipment for free. Where it doesn’t matter if you fail because you still have a nice warm rent-free bed in mom’s house to sleep in every night. The kind of small business you socialist retards want to tax/regulate into oblivion.
Try dealing with payrolls, delivery trucks breaking down, the price of diesel going up, FedEx gouging you for 8% more every time you turn around, insurance jumping 20% in a year, packaging costs going through the roof and suppliers running out of shit constantly because of “supply chain” idiocy.
What a clueless, spoiled, sheltered ass hat.