My issues with local locust Janet “Crazier” Crozier are well documented (HERE and HERE) over the last couple years. She has cost the City a small fortune with her hare-brained schemes, and is currently in the process of trying to sponge ANOTHER $13,000 or so off of the City for her “community garden”. The moment she started grabbing public funds for her “private and volunteer” club is the moment I had to go on the offensive.
Over six months ago, she posted that she was looking for handicapped people so she could grab some more free money in the form of accessibility grants. Mind you, she has ALREADY managed to blow over $15,000 and is looking to grab another $13,000 for rainwater catch tanks. Besides being a VERY questionable use of City HOT funds, the tanks are superfluous in that she ALREADY had the City install pipes and spigots to provide subsidized City water.
Naturally, I had to email her and pretend to be a crippled old Russian in a wheelchair. The entire exchange (which has been running for the last six months) is below. I made my responses more and more ridiculous to see if she would ever catch on. Naturally, she did not.
Janet is in red text and “Haywood Jablowmi” is in blue:
Hello to the Community Garden!
I saw post for gardening with back injuries. I have much interest in this. Is very thoughtful for you to include injured citizens into your grand plans of gardening. I have this kind of injury after many hunting trips and carrying huge load of deer meat on my shoulders. That will crumble the back, for sure. I also spend some time in iron lung but not too much.
I am very interested in gardening as I miss growing very large and girthy zucchini for my wife.
What is your plan for helping us with old bad backs with gardening? I am in the wheelchair but it is very sturdy.
Thanks you very much for this!
Haywood Jablowmi
Lampasas
Thank you for your interest in gardening. I am in the process of writing a grant to allow us to purchase materials to allow wheelchair access. The entrance into the garden is uneven and will require a rubberized material that will not slip so that wheelchairs can maneuver in and around the garden area. Unfortunately it is very expensive and I am interested in seeing if I have enough people interested in gardening to pursue this. Building the raised beds is not a concern. We have most of the materials to do that. The raised beds can be 4’x4′ or smaller, but they will be built so that you can move around the bed. We would like to serve at least 4 individuals to make it worth the effort. Hopefully, we can garner enough interest to pursue this grant.
I will keep your contact information and keep you informed as we start to move forward with this project. Thank you for your interest.
Best regards, Janet Crozier, President Lampasas Community Gardens
Greetings again!
I have wondered about the wheelchair access for the grand community garden place! Have you found anymore unfortunate handicapped souls like myself to grow vegetables by the Hanna pool? This weather is very good for growing now – radishes and other root crops do very well now.
Haywood Jablowmi
Hello again, I know I have talked to others in wheelchairs and at that time I had nothing to offer them. I talked to the Parks Board director this week about getting the entrance into the garden built up and leveled off. There is a very expensive mat that will need to be purchased to enable a wheelchair to come into the garden and have it cover the floor of the garden area so you can move around. This is not a project that can be accomplished with out a grant and some engineering. I am trying to find some people to help with this. Be patient we will get there.
Dear community garden!
Ah yes. I see now. Of course, EVERYTHING is much more very expensive these days – since the year started on very bad foot with Brandon. I’m sure there is some money sloshing around out there in government – there always is. Perhaps I will contact my neighbor Clayton Tucker about this. He has many connections with the government spending, it seems. As champion of the little people in wheeled chairs, I will try to count on him.
I have a question for you, how limiting is your ability to use your wheelchair on a dirt path? Can your wheelchair move on artificial turf? Are you only able to use the wheelchair on level cement or asphalt?
I am very good at traversing all the terrains in my chair with wheels. You name it. On artificial turf during football game. On dirt when chasing down wounded deer with arrow in its liver from good shot with bow. Also on cement, which is easy to roll over at the Wal-Mart.
Sand gives me much trouble. No beach for me. I get bogged down like a monkey doing calculus, to be honest.
Thank you for asking!
I am working on some alternatives to the expensive mat and the equally expensive artificial turf. I have not been able to get the information from the City that I need at this time. I will continue to pursue this before our spring gardening season. Keep the faith. janet
This is very joyous news!! I have told my wife that we will plant bushels of girthy zucchini and squash during the spring solstice. We are both so happy that there may be crying tonight into our borscht. Thanks you, miss Yoder Crozier!
Hello Mr. Jablowmi,
I want to let you know about a class I am offering at the A&M Agriculture Center Conference Room on November 16 at 3:30-4:30. I will be teaching the Square Foot Gardening Method. This is the method that I think would be the most beneficial to you as a wheelchair gardener. The class is free, although I will be selling the Square Foot Gardening 3rd edition book. It has become my bible for all things Square Foot. Of course there is no obligation to buy it, I just want you to know it will be available.
I really hope you can make it.
All the Best,
Janet Crozier, President Lampasas Community Gardens
Hello Ms President of gardens!
This gardening with the feet sounds very interesting. Back home we use square meters but is much the same thing, yes?
The date of November 16th is very bad timing for me! I make my annual trip into west of Texas to Terlingua to watch the Leonid meteor shower! You know of this shower? It is very famous. My great, great, great uncle Wilhelm Temple discovers this comet that makes the meteors every year in November. This Temple-Tuttle comet should REALLY be just “Temple comet” but that yak-eating thief Horace Tuttle try to take some credit and put his name on the comet too. Very sore spot in my family, to be honest.
This is a week-long mecca for me to the west Texas. Being old and crippled in the chair with wheels leaves me with few joys. This meteor shower is one of them – even more joy than gardening the fat zuccini.
I can perhaps make the next instructional class time, yes?
Haywood Jablowmi
I wish I could join you on your adventure but I’m committed. I hope you will be able to come to the December class on the 14th at 3:30. I’m looking forward to meeting you.
Yes, it will be a grand adventure. I have always said, you should be committed!! The December class is the Square Feet gardening as well?
Also I see you on the computer YouTube tonight at a City meeting! Was very exciting! I exclaim “that is the Garden President” and startle my wife with my yelling! Our small dog also barks when I do this.
It was about collecting the rains to put on garden, yes? Rain has much more better properties, I think. Much more nitrogen from falling down through the sky many miles on the way to the squash and zucchinis.
Good Morning Haywood,
I always enjoy your emails. I’m sorry it has taken me so long to respond to your last one. I am keeping my fingers crossed that we will get the water collection system, even if I have to include it in a grant. I visited Monday evening with the Eagle Scout troop leaders and asked that the Eagle Scout work on providing the infrastructure (concrete pad ) for the garden beds to stand on in the handicapped garden area. As I told you, this will take some time because we need to get the pavilion built before we can put in a sidewalk for the wheelchair access. One step at a time.
I hope you have a good adventure in West Texas. Send pictures. Your friend, Janet Crozier.
Good morning, President of Community Gardens Queen!
I made a very big error I am not happy to admit this! I go to the classroom for the square feet gardening a few days ago on December 14th – then realize it was previous day! When daylight saving end, instead of turning clock back one HOUR, I turn clock back one DAY! So I think that Dec 15th is Dec 14th This has apparently been going on for every day since clocks were changed. I am old and crippled and do not work, so I never notice this error of wrong day until I show up on wrong day to classroom. Every day is pretty much the same for me.
Good thing this error was caught or I would have missed the Christmas day holiday, as well as new year.
I am not a fan of this shifting of time to save light. Very confusing to the goats and chickens and others. They do not not like those disruptions at all. Many times, refuse to lay eggs because of this shifting!
But here is wishing you a happy Festivus and Hanukkah and Christmas too.
Haywood
Happy New Year!
I didn’t mean to ignore your email, but I have been helping some gardeners learn the Square Foot Gardening method and helping them decide what they can plant and when to plant in the late winter and early spring. The next and final class in the series will be held at the Lampasas Community Gardens, weather permitting. I’m sure it will be chilly, but we will be building the box and making Mel’s Mix which is the material used instead of dirt. It consists of peat moss, vermiculite, and 5 different kinds of compost in equal amounts. We will demonstrate how to mix it, dampen it, and fill the box. If we have rain, snow or extremely cold weather, we will have a review class in the Conference room at the A&M Extension Center office instead. Of course I will email everyone who signed up and let them know-and that includes you.
The Lampasas Community Garden is behind the Hanna Springs Pool in the Sculpture Garden. Let me know if you can make it. I certainly want to meet the man who thinks I am Queen, ha!
Yours truly,
Janet Crozier, President Lampasas Community Gardens
Good morning, Miss Queen President of Gardening Club,
I hope you are keeping warm during this weather. Reminds me very much of Russia in the spring time, but for Texas it is colder than hair on polar bear’s ass. My chickens refuse to leave nest box.
You included many details in your last email – the location of this class and your secret dirt recipe, which you should not give out so freely! This is a treasure, this recipe for dirt!! But one detail you did not include is the date and time for this making of dirt!
I am wondering if you add worms to the dirt sometimes? This is something I did for many years – adding worms. Big girthy ones are best, don’t you think?
Thanks you!
Haywood
Are you Russian? I thought you might be Eastern European, but I had no clue you were Russian. I went to Russia in 2012. I loved it. I know about the vegetables grown there. I never saw such big squashes before. I went to a friend’s dacha.
Ok let me give you the time of the class. It is planned for next Tuesday, 3;30-4;30 in the community garden. We are praying for good weather. It will probably be chilly, so dress warmly. If it is extremely cold, we will meet at the A&M Extension Center conference Room . The address is 409 E. Pecan St.I n Lampasas. Call me if you have any questions. 512-434-9293.
Good evening miss garden queen president!
How is the planning for spring? This weather still reminds me of Russia winter but maybe over in a few days. I am meaning a regular winter not nuclear winter as Putin is trying to create on poor Ukrainian souls.
Regards
Haywood J
