My Drive Around Town Today: Brodie Estates and Industrial Park.

Every now and then I drive around and hit all the hot spots to see what’s going on. Today I hit several – here is my report:

BRODIE ESTATES: There has been ZERO activity over at Brodie Estates in the two months since I last questioned how S2M2 was going to hold up their end of the bargain after grabbing $185,000 from the City almost three years ago. As a reminder, S2M2 agreed to build 22 houses. They are still sitting at only six. So they only have to build a house about every two weeks to meet their goals. I can’t wait to see what happens when they are nowhere near 22 houses at the end of this year. Another black eye for the Talbert administration.

INDUSTRIAL PARK AGREEMENT: Well, Martin Rod is off to a slow start if he hopes to have 50 boats/trailers in his new lot (supplied to him at only $100 per month, courtesy of the City).

We are now at 6% capacity! Only 12 weeks to go before the first milestone must be met on June 30th.

But he DOES have some nifty signs informing us of all the massive investments that are coming! Food trucks (which I’ve been hearing about in this town for at LEAST 6 years and requires nothing but space), dog park (which also requires nothing but space), cigar lounge, and a mechanical vocational school:

Wait a second! What about the distillery/microbrewery? What about the barber shop! If you’re gonna throw a bunch of bullshit up there, why not go hog wild? None of it will ever happen anyways – well, except for maybe the dog park. All you need is a sign out there that says “This is now a dog park”.

Anyone can buy vinyl banners promising the world. Building all this shit and making it a viable business is another story altogether.

They will call this utopia “Xanadu” – and rich dummies will come from all over the world to get a haircut, smoke a stogie and walk their dog. The City will become a famous mecca for food trucks and they will make their initial investment back 100 times over and create dozens, nay, HUNDREDS of “primary jobs” like Dog Park Attendant and Food Truck Worker.

Just kidding. It’s called Patina Alley and right now, it’s in the “vinyl banner of a pipe dream” stage.

But when it’s complete, it’s gonna be AWESOME!

It’s totally gonna be like that artist’s rendition of the LEDC Business Pork that turned out to be so eerily accurate!

2003 dream they sold us for $7.1 million tax dollars
2023 empty goat pasture and corpse repository

LEDC NON-PROFIT IRS FILINGS: The IRS is WAY behind on posting Form 990 for non-profits. I have been waiting for the 2021 LEDC filing for almost a year now. So, I stopped by Jack Clark’s CPA office and requested a copy. Jack is as nice as can be and was very helpful. I recommend him for ALL of your tax needs!

Anyways, I’m digging through it now. I CAN tell you they skimmed a new record of $422,532 in sales tax off the citizenry that year – crushing the previous record set the year before by 21%.

Where does all the money go?? Well, I’ve covered that before.

City Hands Former Council Member “Greasy” Chris Harrison and Developer S2M2 $185,000 In City Funds For Brodie Estates

More developers grabbing more city dollars. Anyone shocked? You shouldn’t be. We already discussed how mansion owner Deorald Finney got HIS $72,000 gift from City taxpayers.

I’ve ranted about hypocrite “Greasy” Chris Harrison (former City council member) multiple times. HERE and HERE for instance.

Well, the City just cut old Greasy and S2M2 a $185,000 check last month. It sure pays to have friends (and former council buddies) on City council!

Link to City checks written on page 32 – lest some moron accuse me of “slander”

Just a quick reminder of what (massive hypocrite) Greasy Chris Harrison said back on 4/10/15 (page 11) when he was running for City council a second time:

The council candidate [Harrison] said he opposes tax abatements and other financial incentives to prospective businesses. He also said he was against city officials’ economic-development trips to California and a subsequent incentive agreement for a company that moved from California to Lampasas. “To me, it’s not the government’s place to fund private business,” Harrison said.

“The candidate said he learned from a grant program the City Council offered briefly in 2011. Under the program, which Harrison initially supported but later voted to repeal, small businesses that opened in Lampasas after a specified date were eligible for a grant of $5,000 from the city. Harrison said council members had good intentions but learned quickly there were problems with offering taxpayer money to businesses

So Greasy Chris Harrison was opposed to $5,000 grants but he and S2M2 gladly pilfer the taxpayer for $185,000. Lovely.

Here is a brief timeline of how the geniuses on City council went from DENYING S2M2 a $105,000 check as “too expensive” in May of 2019 to then handing over $185,000 last month – links to Dispatch articles are in brackets in case some moron accuses me of ‘slander’ again:

5/31/19 [page 5]: “The pond is estimated to cost $135,000, and McDonald said if he has it built, he will forego $75,000 he could have made had he turned the pond site into three residential lots. As a result, he asked the city to spend $105,000 on the pond – half of what he said it would cost S2M2 if the company sacrifices potential buildable space to create a drainage pond. Council members, however, said that cost is too high to justify for what they said would be minimal drainage improvements in the area. The council’s motion called for no city payment toward a detention pond.”

[McDonald failed to get the free stuff…so he sends in Greasy Chris three months later. Greasy used to sit on City council with the other Goldfish]

8/30/19 [page A4]: Lampasas company S2M2 Inc., represented at Monday’s meeting by Chris Harrison, is seeking city cost-sharing for the detention pond, which would occupy three lots the company otherwise could have used to build houses in its proposed Brodie Estates subdivision. S2M2 is asking the city to spend $125,000 toward the detention pond, Harrison said. That amount, he told city officials, is about half what the water detention structure will cost the company — when factoring in pond development expenses, the value of the three buildable lots the company will sacrifice and the profit that the sale of three houses could have generated. The pond is not required for Brodie Estates.

The mayor said city officials need to think again about a detention pond

[Now that former council buddy Harrison is asking, Mayor Talbert thinks they need to “think again”. Notice the cost has already jumped from $105,000 to $125,000. These wormy shits do this all the time.]

9/20/19 [page 4]: “the City committed to pay S2M2 a maximum of $150,000 for the company’s actual costs of surveying, engineering and building a rainwater detention pond in the subdivision. Council members have said the detention pond is not required to develop Brodie Estates.”

Harrison said developers requested city cost sharing because adding the detention pond will cause S2M2 to sacrifice three lots it otherwise could have used to build houses. On another item, the amended development agreement specifies that the city will reimburse S2M2 a maximum of $40,000 for engineering, easement acquisition, construction and materials for a water line loop.”

Incredible!!

The Seven Goldfish went from “NO, we won’t spend $105,000” to “we should rethink this” at $125,000 to “here is $150,000 PLUS another $40,000 for some water line stuff”

Genius negotiating on the part of Mayor Talbert and the other Goldfish. I guess the taxpaying saps should be thankful that they only got clipped for $185,000 when the maximum possible reimbursement was $190,000.

Gee thanks, S2M2 and Greasy Chris Harrison for leaving a few crumbs! Maybe they can take that $5,000 they “saved” and give it out to Wool & Vine as one of those business grants that Councilman Harrison was opposed to back in 2015. It would be a final bit of irony!

Here is a video of local developers looting City coffers with help from the wizards on City council:

Lampasas Housing In High Demand – Good Thing City Council Dummies Handed Out HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS In FREE CASH To Home Builders

From today’s Dispatch [page 1]:

Between March 16 and March 23, page views of online listings for homes in rural areas increased 115% compared to the same period in 2019, according to Redfin analyst Tim Ellis. Page views of homes in small towns were up 88%.

In 2016, residential construction in Lampasas spiked to 47 new homes from 21 in 2015. From 2012 to 2015, the city added 15.75 homes each year, on average, and from 2016 to 2019 it added an average of 40.25 annually. By May 31 this year, the city had added 17 new houses. If that pace continues through Dec. 31, the city would gain 41 new houses this calendar year. Property values have risen with new construction. From 2012 to 2015, the value of single family houses on lots approximately 2 acres and smaller increased an average of 2% annually. From 2016 to 2019, they grew 4.3% each year, on average.

Well. Sounds like people are flocking to Central Texas from EVERYWHERE…. which anyone with a brain knew was happening for YEARS now. It is CERTAINLY not the type of environment where the City should be handing out HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS OF TAX DOLLAR SUBSIDIES to ‘encourage growth’, does it?

Yet that’s EXACTLY what the morons on City council did. Repeatedly.

I guess I shouldn’t be surprised by that when most of City council has worked for the government their entire lives and have never worked in the real world. That’s how you end up with abominations like handing rich developer Deorald Finney FREE ELECTRICAL HOOKUPS for his 69 houses in Stone Valley that will cost the City over $72,000 in lost revenue.

GIMME $72,000!!!! <——————————-> “Duuuhhhhh…ok!”

It’s also how you end up with City council handing their FORMER FELLOW COUNCIL MEMBER “Greasy” Chris Harrison and his employer S2M2 WAY OVER $150,000 for THEIR development – Brodie Estates.

Great job, City council! What will you do for your next trick? Maybe give a $200,000 subsidy to Wal-Mart? I hear they are really struggling over there!

Residential construction in Lampasas spiked in 2016 and has continued at a similar pace since then, based on statistics through May of this year. BECKY SIMS | CITY OF LAMPASAS

Hiring Scumbags To Beg For Government Money Always Pays Off In Lampasas

“Greasy” Chris Harrison pulled it off! After turning down a request from PRIVATE developer S2M2 Inc for free money back in May, City Council changed their tune and decided to hand S2M2 Inc “a maximum of $150,000 for the company’s actual costs of surveying, engineering and building a rainwater detention pond in the subdivision,” now that “Greasy” Chris (former City Council member) was the one doing the asking this time for his new employer S2M2 Inc.

But that’s not all: “the city will pay to extend electric service to each of Brodie Estates’ platted residential lots. The development agreement lists an estimated city cost of $24,500” – which sounds a LOT like the sweet deal Deorald Finney got for HIS subdivision earlier this year at a cost of around $72,000 for HIS 67 houses.

These “free” electrical hookups (paid for by YOU) run roughly $1100 per house. God forbid the developer pay this and pass it along to the actual homeowner who will benefit! It might cut into his profits! When he sells a $150,000 house, he might only make $24,000 profit instead of $25,000 profit! We cannot have that!

Here’s how I think it went down (this is my opinion – not fact): S2M2 Inc bought this land, figured they could put N number of houses on it, build those houses for $X and sell them for X+$25,000 or whatever the markup is for developers….so they made a deal with the land seller and got all ready to break ground. All well and good – maybe they make a $25,000 profit on 22 houses and pocket $550,000 after all is said and done.

But THEN, they cleared some brush out and cleaned up the land a bit and realized the drainage sucked and they would have to WASTE three of their precious lots building a detention pond! That would take the profit of THREE houses out of their pockets. Let’s say it was $25,000 each (again, I am not a developer, I am pulling number from my ass that sound like realistic ballpark figures). Taking a $75,000 hit for your own screw-up is what private businesses do all the time. But developers are special private businesses (just ask Greasy Chris). They can go to the morons at the City and explain to them how this detention pond is actually in the best interest of the CITY…and not of S2M2 Inc, who is merely trying to help them out.

[Moron politicians and City bureaucrats fall victim to this faulty ‘logic’ all the time. They extend all sorts of “free” shit in the name of “growth” and “expanding the tax base” and it NEVER works out. They do not understand this or care because (1) 90% of them have never run a business (2) they are severely math challenged and (3) it’s not their money they are giving away….it’s YOURS]

It’s the same kind of idiocy that leads towns to spend $100,000 on Christmas lights and say “people will come and visit and we’ll make it all back on sales tax revenue” – which is absolute unmitigated nonsense if you are familiar with third-grade math…which most of these bozos are not.

So – back to our story. A regular, honest, stand-up private business owner would eat the $75,000 and chalk it up to experience. But these scumbags figure, “hey! Let’s go ask the City to ‘cost share’ this with us…we might get $150,000 out of this to make up for our huge blunder!” – after all, the worst they can say is ‘no’, and we’re right back where we started. There is zero downside to begging, in other words.

So, ask the City is what they did. The City said “NO” back in May, as the Dispatch article reported….which was the proper thing to do. But these scumbags took it a step further. They didn’t give up! They then sent in FORMER CITY COUNCIL MEMBER Greasy Chris Harrison to ask AGAIN.

Lo and behold! Mayor Talbert then decided that “City officials need to think again about a detention pond“…because Misti “Drunken Sailor” Talbert apparently equates spending lots of money with being an effective Mayor, from what I’ve seen over the last two years.

Oh…and Chris Harrison owns a dirt works company as well. Lol. You really can’t make this stuff up. Will The Seven Goldfish look into who S2M2 Inc hires to do the dirt work? Will The Seven Goldfish ask to see how much it ACTUALLY cost instead of just accepting the $150,000 figure? Of course not. It ain’t their money.

“Greasy” Chris Harrison: Then and Now – A Study in Hypocrisy.

Amazing what you can find in the archives. Like this little nugget from the Lampasas Dispatch Record (archives April 10th, 2015 – page 11). The Dispatch was interviewing then-candidate Chris Harrison as he ran for City Council a second time (he resigned with a year left in his term the first time around):

The council candidate said he opposes tax abatements and other financial incentives to prospective businesses. He also said he was against city officials’ economic-development trips to California and a subsequent incentive agreement for a company that moved from California to Lampasas. “To me, it’s not the government’s place to fund private business,” Harrison said.

“The candidate said he learned from a grant program the City Council offered briefly in 2011. Under the program, which Harrison initially supported but later voted to repeal, small businesses that opened in Lampasas after a specified date were eligible for a grant of $5,000 from the city. Harrison said council members had good intentions but learned quickly there were problems with offering taxpayer money to businesses.

Wow. Harrison sounds reasonable and intelligent here. He is 100% correct on those points. However, here we are about 4.5 years later and Harrison is singing a completely different tune.

NOW, Harrison has been hired by S2M2 Inc. – a local PRIVATE business. He recently went in front of city council to beg for $125,000 in “cost sharing” to pay for half of a detention pond his employer (a PRIVATE developer) needs. I guess if you are going to steal, then steal big, right Chris? You had a real problem with handing out $5,000 grants to small businesses (rightfully so) back in April of 2015 when you were running for Council but $125,000 to your new employer S2M2 Inc is just fine and dandy! Perhaps it should be Chris “The Hypocrite” Harrison instead of “Greasy” Chris.

It’s also VERY greasy that Council shot down the idea in May, but since FORMER COUNCIL MEMBER Harrison showed up to plead the case, now Misti Talbert says “city officials need to think again about a detention pond.” (Lampasas Dispatch 8-30-19 – page A4 – paragraph 12).

BONUS SCUMBAGGERY: The Dispatch archives also mention that Harrison owns a dirt contracting company he started in 2002. I wonder who will get the big, fat $250,000 contract for BUILDING this detention pond? Is that the deal, Chris? You go beg to your former Council chums for a $125,000 check to S2M2 Inc and then Steven McDonald (owner of S2M2) hands you the dirt contract? Sure looks that way from where I’m standing.

What an absolutely disgusting display of hypocrisy and wasteful spending all wrapped up in a big pile of dog shit. Will The Seven Goldfish look into this? I highly doubt it.