Author: admin

IT/Communications Nerf Position Not Needed – Part I

We learned in yesterday’s Dispatch that the City is considering several new positions. I warned about this almost two months ago:

Finley Laying Groundwork For Bigger City Government

Finley is nothing if not predictable. Of course, the guy who wants to add three positions (and thus hundreds of thousands of dollars of expense) to the City payrolls is the SAME guy who refuses to pay the CURRENT lifeguards at the pool a penny more than minimum wage to attract MUCH NEEDED workers.

But I digress.

From yesterday’s Dispatch:

Combining two roles sounds ludicrous at first glance. What’s next? A combination golf pro and grave digger? Maybe a combination firefighter and library assistant?

But I suspect I know why they did this. There is NO WAY the IT Department needs another person. Somebody (Finley) realizes that is a ridiculous overreach – so instead of imposing a massive new expense on the IT Budget where it will look ridiculous to have FOUR people doing the work that two easily do now [yes FOUR – here is why], they instead make it a “combo” position so it sounds like they are doing a lot more – and they can stick the expense into another department.

Part One of this post will be dismantling the argument that we need a “communications” position at all. Then in Part Two, I’ll get into why we don’t need a FOURTH IT position in a town as small as ours.

PART I – COMMUNICATIONS POSITION IS AN UNNEEDED JOKE NERF JOB:

The Dispatch article tells us “the need for such a position surfaced during Winter Storm Uri, which kept the (IT) department busy informing the public with updates 24 hours a day for eight days while also handling the city’s fiber-optic infrastructure”

So much nonsense in one paragraph! Where to start??

[First of all, Uri was probably a “once-in-100-years” storm that we are unlikely to ever see again. To hold THAT up as a reason to fork over $100k for a new position is the height of idiocy]

What did the IT Department have to “inform the public” about for 24 hours per day?  Closed roads? That’s the Streets Department or Police Department. Frozen pipes? That’s the Water/Wastewater Department. I’m guessing most of City Hall was sitting home due to the City being essentially shut down – just like the rest of us. To try and show the IT Department as working tirelessly “24 hours a day” to “inform the public” is a ridiculous joke. It did not happen.

Also, there are ALREADY about a DOZEN ways that City information is currently disseminated to the public right now. Let’s list a few of them:

The City website, the City Facebook page, the City TWITTER page (yes we have one), the Chamber of Commerce website, the Chamber of Commerce Facebook page, Lampasas County Breaking News Facebook page (they have 22,000 subscribers!), the Mayor’s Facebook page (Misti had this back in Feb 2021 during the storm – TJ Monroe can’t be bothered), Lampasas ISD Facebook page, Lampasas ISD website, Lampasas Dispatch Record website, Lampasas Radio Facebook page, local TV and the LEDC Facebook page AND website!!

What’s that, like a DOZEN different places all telling us the same things? I think we all knew early on that “the power is fucked up and failing a lot”. Having Monica Wright post it over and over on the City website is a prime example of time wasting “busy work”.

Hell, the LEDC Facebook page ALONE pretty much just copies and pastes posts from ALL those other pages. Mandy “Copy and Paste” Walsh’s entire JOB is pretty much doing just that. If anything, we have a MASSIVE duplication of effort and time wasting. If you need 15 different people to tell you the power is fucked up, then you are either brain dead or named Bruce Haywood.

Here is just a tiny sample of the hundreds of “reposts” Mandy does all the time – taking a post from somewhere else and then “copy paste” to the LEDC page:

And Mandy ALREADY costs the taxpayers over $100,000 to do her copying and pasting. The taxpayers need another Nerf job like “communications” director like we need a colostomy bag on our hips.

As for “handling the fiber-optic infrastructure”? I am reminded of The Big Lebowski when he was spewing bullshit to the kidnappers while “driving, talking on the phone and handling the money“

I'm not handling the money, driving the car...

A great way to sound like you are busy when you aren’t really doing shit. THAT’S the IT department “handling the fiber“. But what does that mean, exactly?

The City didn’t have an answer for me except this: “I would refer to the Dispatch with regards to the meaning of the article” – so I guess I’ll email the reporter and ask what it means to be super busy “handling the fiber”!

Stay tuned for Part II

Potato Head Stephanie Fitzharris Wrong Again

Wait a sec…I feel like I’ve typed those words before. Hold on.

Oh yeah:

Potato Head Stephanie Fitzharris Wrong About HCQ

I think there are a few more somewhere. Just type “Potato Head” into the search box and they’ll all pop up.

The latest lie she fell for and re-distributed was this one:

As a matter of fact, my immune system DOES work fine, you tool.

[Actually if you’ve “had Covid before” you are immune, numb nuts! Plenty of high-profile ACTUAL medical doctors understand this. It’s been known for about 100 years.]

Of course, a couple weeks later, the CDC admitted that was a pile of nonsense and retracted the entire thing – making Potato Head Steph look like a horse’s ass for the umpteenth time:

CDC Director Admits Claim That Over 99% of In-Hospital Covid Deaths Were Among Unvaccinated People Was Junk

Israel is also seeing the exact OPPOSITE of what Mrs. Potato Head declares:

Potato Head still thinks masks work too! LOL. Wrong yet again!

Wearing a mask may be sexy for YOU, as it obscures the view of those lovely pearly yellows you have. I’ll pass on wearing one, thanks:

Never take health advice from a clown in a muumuu

Don’t expect Potato Head to ever admit she fell for more hysterical Covid bullshit. She spends her entire life doing it. Just like her buddy Comrade Clayton Tucker:

Sometimes I almost feel sorry for her. Residing on the far left of the Bell Curve with Haywood and Tucker and Maxine Waters must be very depressing. Plus she also raised a little communist kid who lives in Oregon who looks like a huge disappointment to the family. I think I’d kill myself if that happened to me, so I try to have a little empathy.

But then I remember that this moron is a barely-disguised authoritarian who wants unvaccinated citizens to be shut out of society and any empathy I had vanishes immediately. Fuck her.

The Goldfish Swim Tonight: 8-09-21 Council Meeting

A weem-a-way, a weem-a-way, a weem-a-way, a weem-a-way

A weem-a-way, a weem-a-way, a weem-a-way, a weem-a-way

In the fish bowl, the pricey fish bowl, the Goldfish swim tonight!

In the fish bowl, the pricey fish bowl, the Goldfish swim tonight!

Oooooh, oooooh eee-ooo-wam-a-way.

Join us on Gab.com – for live commentary. Find us at The Original Lampasshole.

On tap tonight – more budget talk.

14 Fish Tank Castle Photos and Premium High Res Pictures - Getty Images
Monroe and Williamson sharing a single goldfish brain

Two Weeks Later – California Covidiot Proven a Liar. Just As Predicted.

Two weeks ago, I posted about a hysterical moron in California joining the chorus of Covid lies with her own bullshit story of “hospitals overwhelmed” and “warzones” relayed to her by her brother in Miami.

California Woman Joins Chorus of Liars

I said then “when the data updates in two weeks, we will see that this girl’s story was at best a piece of histrionics, and at worse, a complete and total bullshit fabrication.“

Well – here we are. Let’s look at the Miami-Dade “daily deaths” dashboard

Oops. Still stuck at ZERO, where it has been since June 10th – almost a MONTH ago.

The hysterical press will stop at NOTHING to push this narrative that Florida is in a shambles – because they’re threatened by Ron DeSantis, and realize he’s a more electable and effective version of Donald Trump. They know his policies have worked and are popular there, but they’re trying their damndest to convince the public otherwise.

Don’t believe it. Here is a nationwide snapshot of ICU bed usage (link here):

Image

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R.I.P. Markie Post

Markie Post passed away yesterday at the age of 70 from cancer.

I was always a HUGE Markie Post fan. She showed up over and over on all the popular shows when I was a kid – The Incredible Hulk, Buck Rogers, Love Boat, The A-Team, Fantasy Island, and of course Night Court.

She also popped up later as Cameron Diaz’s mother in “Something About Mary” in 1998 – still as attractive as ever at age 48.

She always seemed like a down-to-earth and likable woman – unlike most of Hollywood. It’s a shame that someone like her gets taken by cancer while human scum like Nancy Pelosi is still walking and talking at age 81. There is truly no justice.

MARKIE POST (Born November 4, 1950) Her film... - Left Handed Patriot Posts

AOC Caught Faking Covid Mask Photo

The ONLY good thing about having a moron socialist with an IQ of around 85 in Congress is she is too stupid to pull off most of the trickery and bullshit her fellow Congress-critters get away with clean.

We saw this previously when she was caught “crying” over “kids in cages”. Turns out it was actually an empty parking lot.

AOC....Screaming At An Empty Parking Lot...aka.... - No Holds Barred Political Forum - The ...

Well, she just got busted again. Bruce Haywood will be devastated to know that most of his heroes are full of shit and don’t actually follow any of the rules the impose on us [see: Pelosi caught at hair salon]. This makes Bruce a classic “useful idiot”, just like his buddy Comrade Clayton Tucker.

Here is the socialist dummy caught once again faking mask obedience:

Yeah, but keep telling me masks work, asshole.

Local Land Manatee Still Demands You Suffer For His Gluttony

This is local dipshit Bruce Haywood:

As you can see, he LOVES to overeat. He loves Krab Kings, Whataburger and every other high fat, high calorie, fast-food crap around.

Overeating is not healthy. It leads to morbid obesity (which Bruce clearly has) and usually early death. Bruce would do himself a world of good by losing about 270 pounds, but that is way too much work. Bruce would rather force you to wear a mask and get an unapproved vaccine so that HE feels safer. Bruce cannot be inconvenienced in any way. Only you can be.

Frankly, I could not care less if Bruce eats his way into an early grave, but Bruce also happens to be a vociferous maskhole (like most libtards) and Covid Cult member who loves to try and shame people into getting masked and vaxxed because he supposedly cares about his health.

This makes Bruce a hypocrite of Haywoodian proportions – and his hypocrisy is now MY problem because douchebags like him are demanding people like me be injected with an unapproved vaccine that doesn’t really work.

If you point out masks don’t work and that more than a few people are STILL getting sick AFTER taking the vaccine, he implies you are a stupid, right-wing FOX News-loving mouth breather.

EVERY doctor? Hardly. Thousands say the opposite:

Masks Don’t Control Viruses

In fact, back in 2003 during SARS I, the government of Australia threatened a fine of $110,000 for even SUGGESTING that masks work:

Farce Mask: It’s Only Safe For 20 Minutes

Feeling stupid yet Bruce? I don’t think Bruce is capable of feeling stupid. Like a fish can’t “feel wet” – it’s his normal default state of existence.

Not to mention, Bruce’s own messiah St. Anthony admitted in private emails that masks are useless against a tiny aerosolized virus:

Fauci Says Masks “Not Really Effective”

Looks like the vaccine is pretty ineffective too, from where I’m standing:

This image has an empty alt attribute; its file name is 1831d790ea54e176.jpeg

Little does Bruce know, that his OWN TEAM is now admitting masks are completely worthless:

Biden COVID Advisor Admits Cloth Masks Are Worthless

Oopsie. A Biden COVID advisor on CNN said this. Hardly the “crazy right wing” that Bruce was pinning his hopes on.

Bruce can never EVER admit he is wrong about masks, no matter how many mountains of evidence pile up against him. That is because he spent the last 18 months bragging about his mask wearing and bitching at everyone else to do the same. To admit he was bamboozled is just too painful to bear – so he will keep doubling down forever like a moron.

Add that all up? Bruce is clearly STILL the dumbest man in Lampasas!

Congratulations, buddy.

As for “dummies” telling people not to get the vax? Here is a compilation of a group of DEMOCRAT dummies doing just that!!

Economic Development!

I’d like to thank the Lampasas Economic Development Corp, their President, Misti Talbert, our Economic Development Director Mandy “Mandy Clause” Walsh and Mayor Thelma Jean Monroe for their hard work and tireless effort in bringing sushi to our town!

Just kidding. None of those dingbats had anything to do with this awesome “development” (see what I did there?).

It was just the beautiful free market and an amazing (privately held) company like HEB that made it happen without ANY help from Mandy and her clipboard.

All thanks and praise to Howard Edward Butt!!

Lampasshole Turns Three Today – Celebrating Anniversary of Finley’s BIG LIE

Happy Birthday to us.

Exactly three years ago, the ridiculous no-bid Azbell A/V monstrosity prompted me to finally speak out about local government waste. Little did I know exactly HOW much waste there was in addition to that A/V system! Millions of dollars more, as it turns out.

Finley immediately told a massive lie the very next month, trying to cover his ass against the colossal waste of money in a September 2018 Dispatch article:

DeGraffenried said if the City Council had decided to seek bids for the audio visual system instead of using the Buy Board method, the city would have had to spend about $10,000 to obtain a professional design for the system. “I think we did get good value — I’m convinced of it,” deGraffenried said of the system the city purchased.

This is what is know as a “bald faced lie”.

The TRUTH is that the city DID originally seek bids – and it accepted the lowest one from Broadcast Works for $33,983 – which INCLUDED a one-year warranty AND training. It is right there in black and white in the City council minutes from August 25, 2014….on page six.

Monica Wright, Information Systems Director, explained that she received three quotes for Professional Service related to Audio/Video Distribution and System Automation for the new Council Chambers:

 Broadcast Works $33,983.00
 Azbell Electronics $41,184.41
 Whitlock $54,411.36

Wright said that the IT Department recommends the award of quote to Broadcast Works in the amount of $33,983. The selected A/V contractor will be required to work in conjunction with the architect, general contractor and sub-contractor, in addition to attending a pre-construction meeting. The scope of work to be done will be in accordance with the contract, which will include a one year warranty, as well as training.

Council member Toups moved to approve the award of quote for Professional Service related to Audio/Video Distribution and System Automation for the new Council Chambers. The motion was seconded by Council member Talbert and with a unanimous vote, the motion carried.

Yet despite all that, somehow that original agreement disappeared in a shadowy back room deal somewhere and Azbell was handed $95,000 without question.

Looks pretty cut-and-dried to me. Finley is a liar, plain and simple. So was Gary Cox, our former Assistant City Manager who was fired resigned over a rumored prank involving goldfish crackers, if you can believe that!

The funniest part? If you actually publicly point out all the lies and money wasting and shady deals (and back up your accusations with copious amounts of hard evidence), you get called a “cowardly keyboard warrior” by the mayor! The very same mayor who babbles about being transparent but then hides behind her lawyer anytime a citizen requests public documents!

Talk about an upside-down world we live in.