Well, someone else must have died in the Tucker family and left Comrade a few shekels! Or more likely, that is some Firefly money right there! Thanks Dad!
How adorable! A little wind-up, 900-pound hybrid truck. It also matches his favorite shirt he wears with his rancher costume all the time. I drove by it the other day and it looked like it would fit into the bed of my own pickup truck.
LOTS of real ranchers drive these, I’m sure. They can tow upwards of 1200 pounds! That’s like TWO mini cows! Mark Langford probably has three or four of them. He loads them with Tannerite and blows them up on his gun range for fun.
However, Comrade Clayton explained his purchase of a hybrid ‘truck’ with a cryptic message: “I’ll be putting in a lot of miles soon, so I needed good mileage!” – which is yet ANOTHER hint he may actually be stupid enough to run for statewide office…like Ag Commissioner. PLEASE GOD let that happen.
[One DOES wonder how a kid with no visible means of employment who lives with mom buys a 2025 vehicle right off the lot and takes the 15% depreciation before he got home. A SMART guy like me only buys three-year-old vehicles. One also wonders how a kid who never shuts up about eliminating fossil fuels is now on his fourth vehicle in six years. And his family owns about 4 or 5 pickup trucks now – the worst gas guzzlers of all.]
Adorable. Perfect size to put a teeny, tiny little mini cow in there! It’s all so cute! Like my daughter’s Malibu Barbie shit with all the accessories!
He wants the tiny cow to be super nice, because he sells them as pets. Not as meat, as a real rancher would do.
He’s a genius! The tiny cows use HALF the water and food! Isn’t that great?! Of course, they grow to exactly half the size as well, so I’m not sure what exactly is gained by this. You could save a lot of time and money by just cutting your herd of “normal” 1200-pound cows in half, if you are worried you don’t have enough pasture or water, you half-wit clown.
Here’s a good joke for you….
A fake rancher named Clayton and a fake Mexican named Beto, are driving down a dirt road when they come across Teddy the tiny cow with her head stuck in the fence.
Beto says “Man I haven’t had any pussy in months!” He jumps out of the truck Prius and just starts banging the donkey like there’s no tomorrow.
Then Beto looks over at Clayton and says “Hey, do you want any of this?” Clayton replies “Sure….but do I have to put my head in the fence?”
Never gets old!