“You keep using that word…I do not think it means what you think it means.”
Years and years ago, there was much fanfare as ground was “broken” on the Lampasas Economic Development Corporation’s “Business Park”. Photos were taken of self-important politicians holding shovels in a 165-acre weed patch that was soon going to attract Big Businesses and “well-paying jobs” to Lampasas.
I laughed my balls off at this back then. The idea of a group of self-important Lampassholes “developing” the local economy is as hilarious to me as Soviet Politburo planners commanding their socialist economy. Anyone with a brain knows it doesn’t work.
Not to mention, the labor pool here is about a foot wide an an inch deep. A large portion of the labor pool has trouble with basic math and spelling….not to mention tying their shoes. If you don’t believe me, go spend five minutes reading Facebook posts on Lampasas County Breaking News.
They have wasted over a million dollars on this boondoggle so far. They even went so far as to have a ridiculous “artists rendition” drawn up of the futuristic, high-paying ‘business park”. See?
Of course, like all the other grandiose plans of dummy politicians, it was a disaster. Here is the current reality – a weed patch where corpses occasionally get dumped:
In a hilarious and ironic example of foreshadowing (look it up, Monica), they later realized their tiny $1,500 sign was almost impossible to read while speeding by at 70MPH – which is the speed limit on that road.
Even funnier is the red splotch on the upper left that reads “SHOVEL READY Q4 2015“. See it? I do. Well, that was a gigantic lie…and still is to this day. How do I know?
I know this by reading the LEDC’s own packets for next week’s meeting. On page 31-32 Mandy Walsh is giving details on the oh-so-huge interest in the Business Park...but the problem is that all of these interested parties are “on an accelerated timeline and we may not be able to accommodate”.
In other words, these saps actually thought that “shovel ready” meant “shovel ready” and they can move in tomorrow! Please!! The LEDC has only spent four years and over a million dollars since the “shovel ready” lie was painted on that sign! What do you think they are??? Miracle workers??
Mandy then adds that (and I quote) “…once infrastructure is in place FOR TRUE SHOVEL-READY SITES, I think we’ll gain even more interest.”
So, to once again parody The Princess Bride, I guess before now the sites were just MOSTLY shovel ready. Not ALL shovel ready, right?
But don’t despair! Pope Eckermann The Engineer has been handed a $100,000 tithe by the LEDC and HE will bless this park with more “development” and the high-paying jobs will then come rolling in! Hallelujah! Praise be to the LEDC!